TwoHundred And ThirtyNine

I thought I'd give You something to read.

I need to fill You in on a few things.
And to be honest, I hope that You can understand or at least, Help Me Out.
I'm about to break an Unwritten Law of My very Own.
I'm gunna write the wee story as if You and I are sitting in the 24hour Tesco on a freezing cold night in Joggies and Hoodies, in Your wee car with Lil' Wayne singing away.
I'm going to look You straight in the eye and 'fess up.

So, remember My blog about the Text, and about
the boy's in the text. And how, that night after reading the creepy text I met a nice Boy called R.
And we hit it off and it was lovely. He's really nice, like, he is.
But something felt, too dull. It was just waaaay too easy.
So I was quite pleased though, because Ross was lovely, and I liked him alot.
Well, atleast I thought I did.
So then, One of the boys who was mentioned in the text, G, was confronted by a very Mad E at Plush the Sunday after this Saturday and He was mortified, and in His ashamed state he emailed me to appologise ....
So We got talking back and forth a few times, and then He asked for My number...
Now in My head, You would interupt Me here, and then I would tell You
"Wait, let Me finish - Gohd"
Right so He got My number and we text a good few times and then He asked Me to Do something On the saturday,
I hummed and hawed over it. I just wasn't sure.
But I said yeah.
So the week progressed and I was texting R and G... yeah I'm not proud either.
And on the Friday I was going to see Saw with R, which was cool, We had a really cosy night, and I felt pretty settled. And like I had kind of decided that if and when I did see G it wasn't gunna come to a head. (You would laugh at this)
That's not what I mean, You creep.
Like it wasn't going to come to anything.
And then Saturday came, and I had thee most fun.
It was just nothing like I expected.
At All.
He just wasn't who I thought He was.
And oh, can He kiss.
And for the first time since He Who Shall Not Be Named, I felt something when I kissed him.
And then I went to R's on Sunday and just couldn't get into the same frame of mind. Could'nt not feel guilty, or sad, or not-his.
It had happened. I had totally lost what I needed.
And now all I had was want.
Then on Sunday I saw G, and we drove and drove, and then I confessed, like I am now, and He seemed, kinda sad, But he told Me things.
About Himself, and About who He is and what He wants.
He tells Me He likes Me and that I make Him Happy.
He tells Me pretty much every night before I fall asleep.
And I like it. Alot.

Now, in the car something Could happen.
Part of Me thinks You're gunna be so mad, and You'll think I'm stepping on toes and You'll want me to just leave it. Leave it all alone.
And another Part of Me thinks that You'll smile and nodd quietly and shake it all off and not care.
I just wish I knew.
So then No matter what I would be trying to make you laugh, and hoping We could go into Tesco and Buy sweets.

Please, because I've wanted to tell You all week.
And all I want to do is drive over and See You so You can either Shout at Me or Give Me a cuddle.
And that I can try and make You feel even a little bit better.

That's all I want.